Dear Thomas, James, and Margot,
Confidence is one of the most powerful forces in this life. I want you to understand that. It shapes the way you walk through the world. It defines how you show up—not just for others, but for yourself. Without it, even the most gifted person can live a small life. With it, even someone with modest talent can do something extraordinary.
But here’s the thing—none of us are born with confidence. It’s not a gift some people just have while others don’t. It’s not something that magically arrives one day. Confidence is earned. It is built. It is something you construct from the inside out, brick by brick, through self-awareness, effort, and truth. You develop confidence when you know who you are—when you can look yourself in the mirror and say, “I know what I’m made of,” and mean it.
To get there, you must begin by knowing yourself deeply. Be honest. Be brave enough to face your weaknesses without turning away from them, and wise enough to recognize your strengths without arrogance. Look closely at your character. Look at the promises you make to yourself and to others. Look at the kind of person you are when no one is watching. If you want to believe in yourself, you have to be someone worth believing in. That doesn’t mean you need to be perfect—it means you need to be honest, resilient, and committed to becoming better.
The world will sometimes try to measure you by external things—success, beauty, popularity, titles, trophies. But I promise you, none of those things will mean anything if you don’t believe in yourself first. And I don’t mean the shallow belief that disappears when things get hard. I mean the kind that stays solid in the storm—the kind that whispers, “I’ve got this,” when the whole world says otherwise. That kind of confidence only comes from work. From repetition. From discipline. From knowing that you’ve been through hard things before and came out stronger. From doing what you said you’d do, again and again, even when it was hard.
And you must protect your confidence. Because the opposite of it—self-doubt—is not just a feeling. It’s a thief. It will rob you of joy, of possibility, of momentum. It’ll creep in quietly, often disguised as humility or caution, and convince you to shrink. It will convince you to play small, to stay safe, to avoid the spotlight or the risk or the leap. And worst of all, it will try to convince you that you’re not ready, not worthy, not enough. Don’t believe it. Don’t give it your voice. Doubt may whisper, but you don’t have to listen.
I want you to remember something that has guided me through every season of my life: confidence isn’t about knowing everything. It’s about trusting that you’ll figure it out. That you’re capable. That you’ve done the work to prepare, and when the moment comes, you’ll rise to meet it. People will sense that in you. They’ll see it in your posture, your words, your consistency. And because of that, they’ll follow you. They’ll trust you. Confidence is magnetic—but only when it’s real.
When I’ve struggled in my own life, when I’ve faltered, it’s almost always because I started doubting myself. When I’ve found my way back, it’s because I remembered who I was, and I got back to doing the work that made me strong. That work never stops. And it’s never wasted. You don’t know when life is going to call on you to be bold, to lead, to carry someone else through their pain, or to take a risk that could change everything. But when it does, you’ll want to meet that moment with a quiet fire inside of you that says, “I was made for this.”
You are all so beautifully unique, with your own talents and ways of seeing the world. Don’t ever let anyone else define your worth. The world will try to tell you who you are. You tell it back—through your actions, your beliefs, and your confidence. Carry yourself with pride, not arrogance. With steadiness, not bravado. With the kind of inner peace that can’t be shaken by success or failure.
And above all, keep your promises to yourselves. That is the bedrock of confidence. If you say you’ll do something, do it. If you set a goal, pursue it with your whole heart. That’s how you build trust with yourself. And that trust, more than anything else, is what makes confidence unshakable. Because you’ll know that no matter what happens, you can count on you.
So walk tall, my loves. Not because life will always be easy, but because you are strong enough to face it. Believe in the person you’re becoming. Believe in your ability to grow, to endure, to create, to lead, to love. And when you stand in front of the world, or in front of a mirror, I want you to carry this truth in your heart:
You were not made to shrink. You were made to shine.
With all my love and belief in you,
Dad
Confidence isn’t luck. It’s not personality. It’s the byproduct of doing the work—of showing up consistently, honoring your word, and becoming someone you trust.
If this letter reminded you of the strength already within you, I’d love to hear from you.
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I’ll be back tomorrow with another episode. Until then, carry yourself with quiet conviction. You’re becoming someone worth believing in.
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